Currently being driven a bit mad by the perky little radio ad for McDonalds, which seems to be on every 27 seconds. You know the one: there’s "make up coffee" – there’s "break up coffee" – there’s "when I was your age coffee". What the Perkins is "make up coffee"?
I do understand that the purpose of advertising is to big up a company’s products, but McD’s is all about the burger. No two people in the history of the known Universe ever said to each other "Ooh, I fancy a really good cup of coffee." "Good idea, let’s hie us to McDonalds forthwith." It ain’t going to happen.
In evidence of this assertion let me take you back a few years to an occasion when I took Boys 1, 2 and 3 (of 3) to our local McD’s of an evening. I was not eating (I had a date with the now Mrs WeeKeef), but ordered a latte. On first taste I discerned that I had been sold a black coffee and returned to the counter to correct the position (a common occurrence at the golden arches). "Oh no" says the prepubescent girlie behind the counter, "I gave you a latte." So I take the lid off the cup to display a full-on coffee of unarguable blackness. "Yes," she says, "that’s a latte. I pressed the latte button and that’s what came out."
I spent fully two seconds considering which to explain first:
- the concept that the machine may be wonky;
- the actual meaning of the word latte; or
- the fact that she obviously was not worth the 2 little stars on her badge which signified that she was in the running for employee of the afternoon.
In the end I had a Diet Coke, because they had run out of "really can’t be arsed coffee".